My name is Hakima Tantrika and I’m a tantra teacher who has embodied the essence of tantra for the last 10 years. I am also a relationships coach working with clients all over the world who are exposed to narcissists and want to have healthier relationships. I have made it | Read More
Many people had traumatic experiences around their sexuality. These experiences can leave the deepest imprint into the unconscious. When it is too much to process, we often suppress emotions and sensations.
Tantra origins are considered to be in India where practicing ancient tantric techniques is believed to be effective in healing sexual trauma. Unresolved trauma seeks expression through physical, emotional, mental and spiritual levels. This article introduces 5 common issues experienced after sexual trauma. You will learn 5 tantra techniques you can practice daily for sexual healing.
What is tantric healing?
In Sanskrit, tantra means “network”. It refers to weaving together patches of fabric into a larger whole. This image illustrates the belief that everything is interconnected. Nothing exists independently, and everything is part of the same reality. Tantra helps us experience this interconnection. We bring the unconscious conscious. The body stores suppressed emotions and sensations. It is a heavy load that influences day-to-day interactions with others. Tantric healing releases suppressed emotions and sensations. The body starts to relax and feel safe. The door is open to experience connection, freedom, and pleasure.
What kind of sexual issues can be healed through tantra?
Tantra is beneficial to heal traumas related to sexuality. Here are 5 sexual issues that can arise unconsciously from traumatic sexual memory. Note that these patterns are not definite indications of sexual trauma.
Premature ejaculation can be a response to repressed sexual trauma. The sympathetic nervous system – our fight or flight response – controls ejaculation. When it is overactive – because of anxiety or stress – it contributes to premature ejaculation. The body becomes hypersensitive to any stimulation. Read our guide on using tantra to help with premature ejaculation issues.
Loss of erection
The fear of losing erection causes as much anxiety as premature ejaculation. It is often associated with aging or a loss of novelty in the relationship. However, tantra considers the loss of erection as unresolved emotional trauma from the past that is triggered by being in a relationship.
Vaginismus and vaginal pain
Vaginismus is a contraction of the muscles around the vagina. It can come with vaginal pain. Pain and contraction in the vagina can be an indication of unresolved emotional trauma. It can also be the body’s way of saying “no” to sexual relationships that are not honoring and loving. Read our guides on using yoni steaming and yoni eggs for vaginal health.
Loss of sexual desire
Some women lose sexual desire which results in a dry vagina. It is often connected to emotional factors in her sexual relationship. When she has sex despite not being ready for it, she experiences dryness. It can cause lesions in her vaginal wall that make her prone to infections.
Body armoring is our body’s response when we decide to stop feeling emotions or sensations. We often make this decision in response to painful or uncomfortable sensations. With it, the body shuts down the capacity to feel pleasure, excitement, and joy.
What tantra techniques are used for healing?
Sexual tantric healing can help solve these issues. Tantra healing process is simple but it takes time and dedication. Let me share 5 tantra healing techniques that you can practice daily from today.
Relaxation is an important part of healing. Before we reach orgasm, we tense and contract our pelvic muscles. It can lead to premature ejaculation or vaginismus. When we learn to remain calm and relaxed during lovemaking, we remove tension. With tantra yoga, meditation or massage, practice being more present and relaxed. Then, during sexual encounters, remember this state of mind to get out of your head. With relaxation, you avoid tension that comes from performance anxiety or self-doubt.
Breathing goes hand to hand with relaxation. During lovemaking, we generally start breathing rapidly and panting. Practice this tantric belly technique daily and during lovemaking.
- Lay down in a comfortable position and close your eyes.
- Remain completely still, relaxing your anal and genital muscles. Press your tongue against the roof of your mouth to keep your jaw relaxed.
- Without changing anything, watch how you breathe and feel how deep each breath goes.
- Open your mouth and breathe more deeply and slowly. Imagine that your belly is an empty balloon that fills and empties with each relaxing breath.
- Put your hand on your belly and watch it move in and out as you breathe. If your hand isn’t moving, force the air down deeper. Make sure that your breath is moving your hand, not the extension of your stomach muscles.
Reconnecting and accepting your emotions
To reconnect with your emotions and heal from body armoring, practice this exercise. This is my favorite and the most difficult one. I call it the “emotions check-list”. Set a daily alarm at 9 am, 4 pm and 9 pm and take note of your feelings throughout the day. Please don’t judge them, let them be. With dedication, it will become easier to recognize your feelings and accept them. Shame or guilt will be released gradually.
Yoni or lingam massages
Yoni or lingam massage are massages of female (the yoni) or male (the lingam) genitals. It doesn’t involve intercourse neither orgasm nor ejaculation. When nothing is expected in return, a woman or a man receiving yoni healing and lingam healing are able to let go completely. This can be a liberating experience if done with the right practitioner. For women, sometimes, it heals immediately vaginismus. For men, it removes accumulated tension in the prostate area, which affects the blood flow needed for a healthy erection. Explore the articles below for further reading…
Sounds and movements
After a traumatic experience, most people keep silent or become stiff. A traumatic experience can immobilize you in a state of arousal and fear.
Having a safe place to express raw sounds helps to open the throat chakra. Find a safe and quiet place, if possible somewhere in the middle of nature – by the sea, in a forest, in a garden. There, feel free to scream and make raw sounds. If it helps, choose your favorite jungle animal, close your eyes and imitate its sounds.
Dancing and shaking are important elements of tantric healing too. Movement increases the ability to focus on the present moment. It is a good physical and emotional release. It frees the body from tension, contraction, and blockages. Thus it allows blood and sexual energy to flow normally.
Consider using a trained specialist
In this article, I have introduced 5 tantra healing techniques that you can practice on your own. However, consider receiving a tantra healing with a well-trained and gifted tantra therapist. Karma Tantric therapists offer a safe place for relaxation and reconnection with yourself. Tantra for healing trauma is a powerful tool that anybody has access to. Click here for more information on all our tantric treatments.