Paisley Gilmour is an NCTJ-qualified journalist specialising in sex, relationships and all things LGBTQ+. Follow her on Twitter. | Read More
You’ve probably heard people reference – and make jokes about – happy ending massages. But they aren’t just a myth. Happy endings really exist. The meaning of a happy ending massage is simple – it’s a massage that ends in a hand job (if you’re a man or person with a penis). Traditionally, they’ve been thought of as something for men, which is why people often wonder, do women get happy ending massages too? Yep, they certainly do.
For women and people with vulvas, a happy ending involves fingering and/or clitoral stimulation. While some first-person accounts tell of massages ending in blow jobs or penetrative sex (sometimes referred to in the industry as ‘The Business’), that’s not strictly the definition of a happy ending massage. So, here’s everything you need to know, from how to find a happy ending massage to how to ask a massage therapist for a happy ending.
What happens during a happy ending massage?
The specifics will change depending on which massage therapist you have, as each service will have its own set of protocols. But this is what you can likely expect from a happy ending massage.
Step 1: Preparing for the massage
Like with any massage, you’ll be taken to the location (most likely a room) and asked to remove your clothes and lie down on the massage bed. It’s common courtesy to shower beforehand. Typically, massages will start with you lying face down. Some masseuses will explain clearly whether to remove your underwear and cover up with a towel, which is known as draping. If you’re unsure, just ask.
Step 2: A slow and sensual start to the massage
Your massage therapist will begin working on your back. They may use hot oils or lotion, and you may be asked what you prefer. They could be clothed, topless or in some cases, naked. This may be discussed beforehand, with you stating your preference. You might notice your masseuse slowly and gradually incorporating your erogenous zones into the massage. A full body massage can last anything from 30 minutes to 90 minutes, with the length likely to be agreed beforehand.
Step 3: The massage is taken up a notch
Halfway through the massage, you’ll be asked to turn over onto your front. This stage of the massage may involve your neck, face, thighs, chest or breasts. They may clearly ask for your consent when moving towards your erogenous zones, or they may look for non-verbal cues from you such as moaning and opening your legs slightly, for example.
Step 4: The happy ending
This tends to happen right at the end. If you have a towel covering your genitals, a hand job or clitoral stimulation/fingering can be given underneath the towel. Some people may be asked/ask to wear a condom. Do not touch the masseuse unless they have given their clear and enthusiastic consent. Many first-person accounts admit this bit is usually over pretty quickly. The point of a happy ending massage is sexual gratification and pleasure, so orgasm and ejaculation are expected (no pressure though!)
Step 5: Freshen up
Once your happy ending is complete, you may be handed a towel to clean up with. Your masseuse may leave the room to allow you to do this and get dressed in your own time. Pop the towel and/or condom in the bin.
Step 6: Tipping
Tips are customary. Tipping expectations vary depending on the service you use and the location, so use your best judgment. And most importantly, don’t forget to say thank you!
Who are happy ending massages for?
While the stereotypical happy ending massage client is thought to be an older man, usually single, divorced or unhappily married, this isn’t strictly true. As sex-positivity and sexual wellness become mainstream, the stigma around happy ending massages is being challenged. And with that, more people – of varying age, gender, sexuality and relationship status – are getting happy endings.
Why do people get happy endings?
There are many reasons why people get happy endings, as massages (and orgasms, naturally) come with loads of great health and wellbeing benefits.
- Improves emotional wellbeing
- Relieves tension
- Boosts your mood
- They just… feel good
- Relieves stress and anxiety
- Lowers blood pressure
- Helps you sleep
- Promotes body confidence
- Can help with premature ejaculation and erectile dysfunction
Do I have to ask for a happy ending massage?
Each masseuse or massage service is likely to operate slightly differently however there are ways to identify if a happy ending is an option. Some therapists will be upfront and discuss your needs and expectations beforehand. Others may expect you to ask outright, by asking if they offer ‘extras’.
There are also code words associated with happy ending massages. If a massage is said to finish with a ‘release’ that is likely to mean it will be a happy ending. Gentle touch, light touch and body rub are phrases often associated with happy endings, too. You may even be offered a Nuru or Body to Body massage. Although happy ending massage is different from tantric massage as it’s more about temporary gratification, some massage therapists may offer what they call tantric massages which are actually happy endings.
Whether you choose to clarify beforehand, deploy code words or ask outright, remember to be respectful at all times. And do not ask for sex.
Where can I get a happy ending massage?
Are happy ending massages legal? Well… Engaging in sexual activities in exchange for money is legal in the UK, the laws covering happy ending massages – and how you advertise and sell them – are confusing. There are also many issues surrounding the licensing of massage parlours and prostitution. This is why you don’t tend to see flashing ‘happy endings here’ neon sign outside of massage parlours. And hence the code words.
While it is possible to find an independent erotic masseuse or to get a happy ending massage from a massage parlour, this can be risky. Bad practices and unhygienic settings are rife if you go to the wrong places. To ensure the best experience in a clean, professional and discrete setting, it’s recommended that you book your massage via a tantric massage agency, such as Karma Tantric, who use only highly-trained, specialised tantric massage therapists.
Guarantee a happy ending with Karma Tantric
And if you’re looking for a tantric happy ending, book in for a Karma Tantric happy ending massage. With a tantric happy ending massage, the masseuse will gradually grow your arousal. They will build your pleasure up and down again, increasing your erotic energy until the final release. Karma Tantric masseuses are trained and can tend to your needs in clean, luxury environments.